We get lots of questions on TechJunkie and we like to answer as many questions as we can. We’ll never be able to answer them all, but this question in particular struck a chord. ‘Why are my Tinder matches not texting? I pair and then nothing happens. What’s going on?’ Dear reader, you are not alone. Thousands of people are in exactly the same situation as you.
There are many reasons why you might find yourself in this position, but most of them depend on what you are doing. The question says ‘I pair and then nothing happens’. Possibly, ‘It’s a Match!’ You see the warning. but then what? Are you texting your spouse or waiting for them to text you?
ignore matches on Tinder
Believe it or not, there is a well-known phenomenon on Tinder like ignoring a match. Sounds stupid doesn’t it? You’re on Tinder to make an appointment. You get a match that can go until that date and choose to continue playing instead of sending a message. If you’re not the first to text, you really should be. It’s okay if your messages intersect in the ether, but something is much better than nothing.
There are many reasons why people match up and then do nothing. This page on Bustle discusses the phenomenon in detail and provides some very credible reasons why you or others would match and then make a move.
It’s about time
Remember that right now time is a valuable commodity. We have less free time than usual and much more demand for that time. Your match could be on vacation, on a business trip, staying with their parents, working to a deadline, in the middle of an important project or case, or anything else that might take time.
Match may not really have the time or mental energy to respond or even fire up Tinder while doing other things. This is not personal, this is life. This is a perfectly logical reason why they don’t text you.
Responding to your first move
The other possible option is that you reach out and they don’t respond. You can use the above reasons for ignoring matches to ignore messages, but it could be more than that. Perhaps your message was boring or lacking in imagination. Maybe he didn’t hit the right note with them.
Here are the many reasons why you may not receive a reply to your message.
they made a mistake
It’s nothing personal, it just happens. Maybe they were just half paying attention, they were drunk, or someone else was stealing for them. Maybe he has a certain type and they swiped you to see if they could break out of that type and realized they couldn’t.
They’re swiping everyone right
This is an incredibly common problem, especially in men. Tinder is a numbers game, so swiping everyone right means they’ll match someone and potentially take action. Once matched, they apply their filter instead of a scrolling step. Annoying but very common.
They’re on a power trip
I knew someone who used Tinder and swiped directly on girls he didn’t want to meet or date. When they found a match, he would ignore them. He thought it gave him strength and showed how much better he was than the girl. It didn’t look like it, except in his head. Everyone else thought it was cruel. He won’t be the only one to do this.
they have already matched
The person you’re matched with may have already matched with someone else and see what it’s like before deactivating Tinder. This happens a lot and is widely accepted. You need to keep your options open until you get to a stage where you can commit to or accept being private. This may be one of those times.
they forgot
It’s possible. They may have matched with more than just you and wanted to reach all of you. They may have written a few matches, got distracted or out of time and completely forgot about you. It’s nothing personal and more about life and distractions than you.
Their friends were matchmakers for them.
This is another phenomenon I’ve seen firsthand. Friends, who are usually women, will offer to do matchmaking and create a Tinder profile and ‘get you a date’. Their friends may have certain ideas about what they want, but their friends have other ideas. You could be matched with one, but not the other, and therefore you were ignored.
There are many reasons why Tinder matches don’t text. The vast majority of these reasons are not even about you. It’s about how people view Tinder and dating apps in general and the relatively low value we place on them. Remember that it is not and will be personal and will continue to hang around. There’s someone out there for you!
We get lots of questions on TechJunkie and we like to answer as many questions as we can. We’ll never be able to answer them all, but this question in particular struck a chord. ‘Why are my Tinder matches not texting? I pair and then nothing happens. What’s going on?’ Dear reader, you are not alone. Thousands of people are in exactly the same situation as you.
There are many reasons why you might find yourself in this position, but most of them depend on what you are doing. The question says ‘I pair and then nothing happens’. Possibly, ‘It’s a Match!’ You see the warning. but then what? Are you texting your spouse or waiting for them to text you?
ignore matches on Tinder
Believe it or not, there is a well-known phenomenon on Tinder like ignoring a match. Sounds stupid doesn’t it? You’re on Tinder to make an appointment. You get a match that can go until that date and choose to continue playing instead of sending a message. If you’re not the first to text, you really should be. It’s okay if your messages intersect in the ether, but something is much better than nothing.
There are many reasons why people match up and then do nothing. This page on Bustle discusses the phenomenon in detail and provides some very credible reasons why you or others would match and then make a move.
It’s about time
Remember that right now time is a valuable commodity. We have less free time than usual and much more demand for that time. Your match could be on vacation, on a business trip, staying with their parents, working to a deadline, in the middle of an important project or case, or anything else that might take time.
Match may not really have the time or mental energy to respond or even fire up Tinder while doing other things. This is not personal, this is life. This is a perfectly logical reason why they don’t text you.
Responding to your first move
The other possible option is that you reach out and they don’t respond. You can use the above reasons for ignoring matches to ignore messages, but it could be more than that. Perhaps your message was boring or lacking in imagination. Maybe he didn’t hit the right note with them.
Here are the many reasons why you may not receive a reply to your message.
they made a mistake
It’s nothing personal, it just happens. Maybe they were just half paying attention, they were drunk, or someone else was stealing for them. Maybe he has a certain type and they swiped you to see if they could break out of that type and realized they couldn’t.
They’re swiping everyone right
This is an incredibly common problem, especially in men. Tinder is a numbers game, so swiping everyone right means they’ll match someone and potentially take action. Once matched, they apply their filter instead of a scrolling step. Annoying but very common.
They’re on a power trip
I knew someone who used Tinder and swiped directly on girls he didn’t want to meet or date. When they found a match, he would ignore them. He thought it gave him strength and showed how much better he was than the girl. It didn’t look like it, except in his head. Everyone else thought it was cruel. He won’t be the only one to do this.
they have already matched
The person you’re matched with may have already matched with someone else and see what it’s like before deactivating Tinder. This happens a lot and is widely accepted. You need to keep your options open until you get to a stage where you can commit to or accept being private. This may be one of those times.
they forgot
It’s possible. They may have matched with more than just you and wanted to reach all of you. They may have written a few matches, been distracted or out of time and completely forgot about you. It’s nothing personal and more about life and distractions than you.
Their friends were matchmakers for them.
This is another phenomenon I’ve seen firsthand. Friends, who are usually women, will offer to do matchmaking and create a Tinder profile and ‘get you a date’. Their friends may have certain ideas about what they want, but their friends have other ideas. You could be matched with one, but not the other, and therefore you were ignored.
There are many reasons why Tinder matches don’t text. The vast majority of these reasons are not even about you. It’s about how people view Tinder and dating apps in general and the relatively low value we place on them. Remember that it is not and will be personal and will continue to hang around. There’s someone out there for you!
